Seeing Red Again
by bleach-freak45
Summary: Shizuo is forced into getting help for his 'anger issues' he is forced to be admitted to a mental health facility Izaya hears about this and decides to investigate what he finds leaves him with a different state of mind Izuo/Shizaya yaoi angsty/sad
1. Chapter 1

**Ahhh hello! Well, this is just a short preview of a story I'm thinking of writing, if I get enough feedback I'll continue it when school gets out.**

**This will be mostly Izuo at first, but towards the end it will be more Shizaya, yes, Shizuo will be very OOC, but that's the point so please, review and tell me what you think.**

**Since you wont really get it let me explain whats going on:**

**Shizuo is contained in a mental hospital, Izaya is visiting him, their relationship is not very clear yet to either of them**

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It rained that day.

It rained so hard, so hard I thought the world was crying, I thought that maybe, just maybe the world would burst so I could fly away from here.

So I just sat and stared at the rain as it fell down onto the busy streets of Ikebukoro. The cars flying by on the road below, the twinkling array of neon lights all became blurs in my vision from the water falling from above.

Or was I just crying?

It was hard to tell.

_Knock Knock_

"Heiwajima-kun?" the timid nurse mumbled as she shyly peeked her head in the door. I had been here for a while now, they had since dropped the 'san' for the friendlier 'kun' maybe it was part of the warm atmosphere they brag about so much.

Bullshit.

I turned my head slowly and hoped that I wasn't crying, I guess I wasn't because she didn't give me a look of pity like she has in the past, or maybe she just didn't care anymore.

She gave me a sweet smile and stepped into the room, her heels clicking loudly on the hard floor beneath her.

"You have a guest, are you well enough to see him?"

I gave her a nod and she left the room. I knew who it was.

It was always the same person, the only person who couldn't see what they saw, the one who first named me a monster was now the one denying the fact.

The only one.

I hear the voices, they scream it in my ears, I'm a monster, violent and out of control, I might have thought my heart was good, but really it's just black and full of evil.

"Shizu-chan?"

I blinked twice to find Izaya waving his hand in front of my face. I pushed it away gently.

He took a step back and stared down at me with a questioning eye but said nothing.

"I brought you something today Shizu-chan."

He held out a plastic bag which I shakily took from his hands. Opening the bag I couldn't help but smile. Laying inside the bag was a pack of cigarettes and one of those small strawberry shortcakes you get from the convenience store.

The small act of kindness sent a jolt through me heart, it was such a nice thing to do, especially for him. With a grin I got up from my chair and put a hand on his shoulder.

"Thanks flea."

He grinned back but instead of patting my shoulder he threw his arms around my waist and buried his face in my chest. Hesitantly I returned the hug, my trembling hands resting on the small of his back, then I pulled him closer and rested my chin on top of his head.

He was so warm.

I wasn't sure what had been happening lately, ever since I was sent here he had come to visit me everyday, our relationship changed. We no longer seemed to hate each other and it was strange because it was something I wasn't used to, and I wasn't sure, but I think I liked it.

He started to tell me that I wasn't a monster, that everything I had been told was a lie. Somewhere on this strange road I realized that I had fallen for him.

"Shizu-chan..." Izaya whispered, his rust-colored eyes looking into mine, I could feel him looking into my soul

and it burned.

He was smiling, his eyes lighting up as he pulled up the corners of his lips highlighting his rather attractive features.

He slowly leaned into me, standing on his tip toes, closing the space between us and gently touching his lips to mine.

I closed my eyes and kissed him back. In this moment I didn't care that I was kissing Izaya, my former enemy, another man.

Because I was so lonely, and having someone touch me was the best thing in the world. When you're as lonely as I was, you wont turn away anyone or anything that comes to stand by your side.

Even if they only want to hurt you.

Izaya's lips were warm and soft against mine, he hooked his arms around my neck and pulled me closer. After a while he pulled away and started kissing down my neck.

"Izaya..." I said, my voice hushed.

"Mmm?"

"Why have you been so nice to me?"

He froze and pulled his lips away from my neck.

"I..."

I guess he didn't know either.

He sighed and leaned back into me, hiss arms hooking around my waist, "I don't have a reason and I can't explain it, I don't plan to either. He stated, "Just let it be Shizu-chan." he murmured hugging me tighter.

"You think too much." he sighed.

Despite the aching in my heard I smiled.

Izaya confused the hell out of me and somewhere in the back of my mind a voice was screaming at me, telling me not to trust him, not to give in, but I couldn't help it.

When I was with him I felt so warm and safe. I felt like myself again.

The one that first caused the red was now making it fade. This was a confusing yet comforting concept to me.

But I wouldn't have it any other way.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summer is hereeeeeee~! And as promised, I said I would update when school was out, so now that I'm on vacation I will (hopefully) be updating this as frequently as possible.**

This is the first actual chapter, the last chapter was just like a prologue kinda thing, so the story actually starts here. Well, please read, review, and enjoy~!

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"You're kidding me right?"

My eyes were narrowed up at the lady in the white coat who was annoying the hell out of me at the moment, the two larger men who looked like body guards flanked her on each side looking like they were ready to attack me at any moment. I'm not sure why they're here, or why the hell this lady is telling me some shit about me needing major help and blah blah blah, some crap I don't understand, so I just tune out.

I hear the words _Mental Ward_ and _Medication_ and I'm suddenly paying attention again.

"Um...excuse me? Did you just tell me that-"

"Heiwajima-san, you are in need of help for your irrational violence and severe anger issues." The blonde lady in the white coat interrupts me. I keep calm for the moment even though her comment pissed me off majorly, thank god I just had a smoke before she came to _my_ house and interrupting _my_ evening.

"And what makes you think this is a problem that needs to be solved with medication and me being admitted to a mental ward?"

The lady gives me a cheery smile that's obviously fake, "We have anonymous sources Heiwajima-san, these sources tell us that you are in dire need of help before you become self destructive and-"

_Anonymous sources huh?_

_Gotta be that bastard Izaya...damn louse._

I hold back a laugh, "Self destructive?"

The blonde lady nods, her semi-short ponytail bobbing along with her head, "Yes Heiwajima-san, if these habits keep going on then you could not only be a danger to other around you, but you could be a danger for yourself." she explains.

Dear lord she is pissing me off...everything about her is making me angry. That look in her eyes, that stupid ponytail hanging off her head and bobbing every time she spoke. Too bad I cant hit chicks, 'cause if I could she would be first on my list.

I clench my fist and grind my teeth together, the bulky men flanking her seem to notice my agitation and they twitch forward, ready to grab me if I get to out of control.

Because apparently, I need help.

Idiots...all of them.

Why the hell, after all these years of living in Ikebukoro, with almost everyone aware of my monstrous strength, why after all these years would someone decide to try and get me help? It just doesn't make any sense.

I get up with a yawn and slowly stretch out my limbs, the two body guards almost having a heart attack when my hand lands on the blonde lady's shoulder. She flinches.

"Look lady, I'm terribly sorry but this 'source' has very wrongly informed you, this strength of mine is no different than it has been in years and I don't need any help."

"Heiwajima-san, I am here to try and get to the source of all your anger, so that maybe we can get these habits to stop."

"Dumbass..."

"Excuse me?"

I sigh, "Never mind, look um I don't know how to be any clearer, but could you please just leave?"

The blonde lady gives a sickeningly sweet smile and motions for her two body guards, they walk around me so that they're standing behind me.

I glare back at them and she continues talking, "I'm sorry Heiwajima-san, but I'm afraid that I can't just leave you like this."

I narrow my eyes at her, "Like _what_?" I snap, no longer trying to conceal my annoyance in any way.

She smiles at me and inclines her head.

I feel a slight prick in my arm and my vision swims, the blonde lady's face a distorted blur in my vision. I try and lean against the wall for support but it's too late, I'm already falling.

"...you must be mistaken...never been any problems with him before!"

"...personal doctor?"

"Yes."

The tile beneath my feet is white, shiny...is it wet? It's cold.

Dear god it's so cold. It's like ice is being injected into my veins. "Get Shizuo a blanket please! He's shivering!"

There's a warm hand on my shoulder, its warm, so warm. Now it's gone, no come back.

I shiver once more, with one last blink my vision is finally clear. The tile isn't wet, it's just sickeningly shiny, like its been waxed too much.

It's white, almost blindingly so. Slowly lifting my head from the table I examine my surroundings, even though I'm too groggy to defend myself.

The warm hand is back, someone is behind me but I don't feel like turning around to see who it is. Ah, the blonde lady, she's back.

She sits in front of me, that stupid smile on her face and she's just staring at me, like a wolf about to catch it's prey.

"Good morning Heiwajima-san."

"Fuck you."  
>She chuckles to herself and jots something down in a small notepad, I narrow my eyes.<p>

"Shizuo! You're not even going to acknowledge your best friend?~"

Ah, so that's who it is.

"You idiot you're standing behind me, I don't have eyes in the back of my head."

"Haha~true true."

I sigh and stretch out my limbs, I notice the whole room is white, even though the walls are different shades it blends in with everything else to form just one big damn...white.

I'm starting to hate that color...

"Shinra, what the hell is going on?" I ask him, my voice is rough, like I'd just woken up with a bad cold.

He gives a nervous laugh, "Well you see, that's what I'm trying to figure out~"

With a deep sigh I get up from the uncomfortable plastic chair they sat me in and start walking towards the door, "I'm outta here."

I hear someone chuckle behind me and then suddenly the door closes with a loud slam, just inches away from my nose. I narrow my eyes and pound on the cool metal surface with my fist.

…..not even a small dent. It's like they Shizuo-proofed this place. Not to mention how strong their drugs must be, for it to knock me out long enough for them to get me and Shinra here.

I turn around and scratch the back of my head with a yawn, I was unusually tired and I really just didn't care enough about these people anymore to be angry.

"Can I please just leave?"

The blonde lady motions for me to sit back down but I just continue to glare at here with my arms crossed. She gives up after a moment and turns in her chair to face me. "Heiwajima-san-"

"Stop calling me that."

"Well...um, Shizuo then, I've already told you that I am required by law to keep you here until you are declared...stable."

My fist clenches, but I try hard not to yell, I figure getting angry won't help me much in this situation.

Shinra moves to stand beside me, he places a hand on my shoulder as if to calm me down. "Don't worry Shizuo-kun, I'll get you out of here soon."

He gives me one last apologetic look and then he's escorted away by a large man.

My glare is still fixed on the blonde lady, "So?" I say.

"Excuse me?"

"So...? Let's get this damn treatment thing over with so I can go home." the blonde lady (who's name I still haven't been told and I don't really care to know) gives an amused chuckle, "Heiwaji-...I mean Shizuo, this isn't just a 'treatment' you will be required to live in this facility, you will receive various amounts of medication and visit a therapist twice a week." She explains.

Me? Live here? I give another sigh, that sounds like hell, if I don't get away from all this white soon I might explode.

"Well..." she says, getting up from her chair that I notice looks much more comfortable than the one they put me in, "Let's get you settled in now and give you some time to get used to things around here."

I narrow my eyes at her but let her and her two 'guards' take me away, too tired to care about much of anything right now.

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**Reviews help a lot! I don't feel like I need to update unless I know that people are actually reading and enjoying my stories, and constructive criticism is always welcome as well~! (no flames people, please... D:) I'll also try to reply to them (if I remember OTL)**

**Love to all~!**


	3. Chapter 3: IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT

Hello friends! I'm moving to another account! I've had this one for a while now and I think I'll only be keeping it because I have so much on this one. I'll only be using it to continue getting alerts for fanfics I'm currently reading and following.  
>I'm going to keep my stories up for now but they will be deleted soon.<br>As for Monster, How Should I Feel?

I plan on rewriting it. I'll keep it up here until I post the first new chapter on my new account.

Thank you all for your support and feedback! I hope to hear from you all again soon!


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